How a man on the Spectrum learns to live

I Won’t Give Up

Ready to Live!

Ready to Live!

You know something?  There’s a reason why Jason Mraz is one of my favorite musicians of all time.  For me, he’s written some of my most favorite songs.  One of them is a hit that’s been a fixture on the radio for a year and a half now.  Off of his latest album: “Love is a Four Letter Word” it’s the beautifully written “I Won’t Give Up.”  The title alone draws me in with its positive feel, and the lyrics reignite the hopes and desires I have with regard to life and love.  Even though I haven’t been with a woman since ending my last relationship more than four years ago, I know that I have so much to offer the right one.

Living with Autism, I’ve dealt with challenges in my life, and there’s going to be days that will bring up negative feelings.  However, I’ve learned to let go of past regrets and remember all the strides I’ve made in showing the world what I can be.  I know I’ve got a lot to live for and there’s so much that’s on my bucket list that I can’t afford to stop living with so much to create and offer people who are on and off the Spectrum.

As the song opens, I imagine what I’m telling my dream girl when we make that magical connection.  “When I look into your eyes…it’s like watching the night sky…or a beautiful sunrise.  Well, there’s so much they hold.”  This means that all I need to do is look into her eyes and see her interminable spirit and the limitless blessings that God and the Universe have for us.  “And just like them old stars…I see that you’ve come so far…to be right where you are.  How old is your soul?”  I also acknowledge the work that she has done to become the person that I’m attracted to and that I value the effort she’s made.  I then tell her my honest answer as to where we stand with each other.

Well, I won’t give up on us, even if the skies get rough.  I’m giving you all my love…I’m still looking up”.  One of the most important things I’ve learned is to be attentive to a woman without being needy or smothering.  The second verse tells her that I am more that willing step back when she needs to be alone, but I will always be nearby with a warm embrace and open ears to listen to what she needs to say.  When this happens, I’ll remind her that even the best of us have setbacks both large and small, but there’s always a lesson to be learned when they’ve passed and we’ll hold on to each other to get through them because we trust each other.  “And when you’re needing your space…to do some navigating…I’ll be here patiently waiting to see what you find.  ‘Cause even the stars they burn…some even fall to the earth.  We’ve got a lot to learn; God knows we’re worth it…No, I won’t give up!”

The bridge of the song says so many lyrical things that it gives me strength to be trusting.  I don’t know how or when it will happen, but I hope for the best.  I know that our trust and friendship will be solid because they are the strongest things to base a relationship on.  Now that I think about it, doesn’t the word “intimacy” sound like the words “into me, see”?  That can’t be a coincidence!  “I don’t want to be someone who walks away so easily, I’m here to stay and make the difference that I can make.  Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use the tools and gifts we’ve got, yeah, we’ve got a lot a stake!  And in the end, you’re still my friend at least we did intend for us to work, we didn’t break, we didn’t burn.  We had to learn how to bend without the world caving in.  I had to learn what I’ve got, and what I’m not, and who I am!”

When the chorus repeats for the last time, my heart is fully engaged.  The words ring true for me and say what I feel about life and love.  No matter how long it takes, I will find the right woman because I was meant to share my authentic self with her.  I’ve come a long way since I was diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome because knowledge really is power, and the world has learned a lot, as have I.  Gone are the days when I lived under a label because today I embrace being on the Autism Spectrum, body and soul.

In the future there will be good and bad times and everything in between, but as long as I remember who I am today, I’ll be able to face whatever happens.  I look forward to the day when I walk down that path with the woman I was meant to be with.  As long as I have music to speak to me, I’ll have the power to give a voice to my feelings.  When that happens, I’ll feel them, deal with them as needed, and go on from there.  I’m proud of how far I’ve come; I’ve got farther to go, but I’m glad that I can share my journey with the world.

“I won’t give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I’m giving you all my love
I’m still looking up, still looking up.

Well, I won’t give up on us
God knows I’m tough enough
We’ve got a lot to learn
God knows we’re worth it

I won’t give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I’m giving you all my love
I’m still looking up.”

See the music video here:


Comments on: "I Won’t Give Up" (2)

  1. Nice share

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